Post by Rayen Young on Feb 6, 2009 22:38:25 GMT -5
One year post Breaking Dawn
The room was strewn with toys, crayons, books, a sock, a shoe. Somewhere in all this mess was the whirlwind that has caused all of this; a storm called Claire. Rayen’s own 4 and a half year old hurricane. She’d only left the room for a few minutes to put away laundry in the bedroom. In just a matter of 10 minutes the order, what little there had been to start with, had been shattered. Slowly and carefully Rayen picked her way across the room towards the kitchen and the sound of more chaos. The kitchen was also littered with pans and plastic bowls all over the floor. In the corner was the storm, still going oblivious to her mother.
“Claire Nia Titan. Look at this mess.” Rayen said picking her way towards her chaos causing daughter.
She wasn’t mad, well not for long once she saw the innocent smile and the joy in the child’s eyes. Who could ever be mad at that beauty?
“What happened in here?” Rayen asked crouching next to Claire and reaching out to tickle her.
Her baby was the reason for everything in Rayen’s life. Rayen felt from the very minute she was born that Claire was worth everything that had happened before. Claire was her angel and in those first few months she was the very reason Rayen cragged herself out of bed and even drew breath.
“Little miss, you need to get this mess cleaned up now.” Rayen picked up a few plastic plates and stacked them together. “Come trouble. You need to help Momma.”
Post by Claire Titan on Feb 9, 2009 1:43:00 GMT -5
Today had been boring. Claire's mama had told her that Quil couldn't come to see her today, and she'd rested her head on Rayen's shoulder to cry a little. She'd been quiet all day being a good girl, but she missed Quil. Once Rayen had gone to the laundry, Claire had a brilliant idea! She would give Quil a present the next time she saw him. She would tell him she had missed him too. Yes. She immediately set out to find something to give him, which proved to be difficult. Quil was funny and tall and warm, and she wanted to give him something special. But nothing seemed to fit. Socks were ugly, he didn't wear lady's shoes, dresses wouldn't fit him. So she gave up on the room and moved to the next. There was a horsie ornament on the coffee table, but it was kind broken; she couldn't lift the chair to give him. She'd try the kitchen instead. This was great! Quil loved food just like she did! She went through the cabinets and drawers but still came up short. The dog had licked that spoon. That was the cup her mommy made her drink orange juice and she wanted to keep it. That bowl was usually for vegetables, she would never give him anything like that.
She had been going through a stack of pots when her mother had finally caught up with her, her eyes wide and innocent when hearing her own name. She was about to explain what she was doing, but her mama tickled her and she succumbed to a fit of giggles instead. She was about to continue her task, but Rayen said she'd have to help her clean up. "Huh? No, mama why?" She didn't understand. Every time there was a mess, mama cleaned it up. Why did she have to do it? Besides, she wasn't done looking for Quil's present!
Post by Rayen Young on Feb 10, 2009 12:10:58 GMT -5
Been a single mom had never exactly been a bed of roses for Rayen, but Claire was a good child. There were never any real problems, except she was spoilt rotten by Quil; a fact Rayen was trying to work on.
This wasn’t the first time her little whirling dervish had upturned rooms without due cause, but it was the first time Rayen had attempted to get her to help clean up. She was 4 years old now, not a baby; a fact which tore at her heart just to think it. Claire was her baby and always would be. Yet Rayen knew it was time for her to take those little steps towards growing up and helping tidy her mess would be a first.
Claire questioned this. That wasn’t unusual she question everything. The little one had a keen mind, but Rayen was ready for her.
“Claire you have to help momma tidy because you made the mess and momma isn’t going to tidy it all on her own.” She said to the innocent eyes. Rayen couldn’t help but wonder what those little eyes and hands had been searching for that had made so much mess.
Post by Claire Titan on Feb 11, 2009 1:03:15 GMT -5
Claire's little face grew more and more confused as Rayen kept talking. Of course she made a mess, she was looking for something important to give Quil so he would know that she missed him all day. Maybe he wouldn't stay away so long again. She had thought it was such a great idea, but her mama sounded like it wasn't and now everything had to be fixed without Claire finding the present."But, why?" She thought anything for Quil was great, and Quil and mama were good friends. Why didn't mama want her to give him a present?
She looked at the pot she was about to look under and realized how much work she had left to do. "I'm not done yet," she said.
Post by Rayen Young on Feb 13, 2009 17:59:11 GMT -5
Looking around yet again Rayen wondered what on earth Claire could have been doing with all of this mess; she wasn’t a disruptive girl normally. Rayen’s parents had recently removed the child locks off the cupboard doors after all agreeing Claire was old enough to know not to go into them, now it looked like they had jumped the gun on that one. Rayen glanced at Claire and saw a distinct look of confusion in her eyes as she asked again why.
“Claire doesn’t momma tidy up her mess? And Grandpa and granny, tidy their mess too, right?” Rayen said gently. “So now its time you tidy up your mess. And I’m not happy at you getting into all these cupboards. This isn’t your play ground Claire Titan!” Rayen could feel the frustration growing inside, the last thing she needed right now was to be tidying the kitchen and her little monster’s mess.
Looking around again she couldn’t understand what Claire had been doing, she knew that the little one knew very well that the kitchen wasn’t a place for her. “Claire, what were you looking for? Tell momma, now.” She said as she gave the little angel a stern glare.
Post by Claire Titan on Aug 25, 2009 1:55:37 GMT -5
Rayen's string of questions momentarily overwhelmed Claire, and she merely blinked at her mother and nodded yes. Yes, everyone always cleaned up after themselves, but at the same time, they usually did so when they were finished making a mess. Claire looked down at what she was holding, the pot handle, and knew she was right. She wasn't done yet.
Her mother's harsh tone surprised her and she jumped slightly when the last outburst was louder than she was used to hearing her mother. Her brow folded slightly, feeling terrible for making her mother so unhappy. Her bottom lip trembled lightly and her eyes glistened with a set of tears. "I'm sorry mommy," she mumbled quietly before her breathing stuttered. "I was just looking for a present."
Post by Rayen Young on Sept 7, 2009 14:17:55 GMT -5
Rayen hated disciplining Claire, it was times such as this she wished she wasn’t a single mother having the support and input of another parent would have been helpful. She was having a stressful week and knew that she didn’t need to be as stern as she was been with Claire; she knew kids were kids after all. Looking down at Claire Rayen knew she was over whelming her and expecting her to function in a world she wasn’t quiet old enough for. Moving from a crouched position Ray sat on the floor beside her daughter. “I’m sorry baby girl; momma isn’t in the best of moods.” She said reaching out to rub her daughter’s arm not wanting to take her crabby mood out on her.
When she saw the effect her outburst had on Claire Rayen instantly moved closer pulling Claire to her. Smoothing her hair and kissing her head Rayen sighed. “No I’m sorry.” She said squeezing her a little. “Momma’s a grump. So who is this present for? Whoever it is honey, I don’t think they want one of our pots.” She giggled wondering who she could be giving a gift too; she knew there were no birthdays at the Crèche or family birthdays so assumed it was someone else.
Post by Claire Titan on Sept 7, 2009 21:15:13 GMT -5
Nodding solemnly at her mother's first apology, Claire tried her best to be a big girl and not cry. She's always seen her mother shake her head at other kids crying loudly, and always told her she was a good girl. She had almost been positive that this gift had been a good thing, but her mother being upset was now confusing her. Rayen was only a split second too late when she pulled Claire in for a hug, and a tiny tear escaped to streak her cheek. She quickly wiped it off, trying to hide it, and tried to recover, just in time for the kiss on her head. She automatically hugged her mother, hoping that it would make her feel better too.
The kiss on her head and the second apology made Claire feel better, and her interest in Claire's task made her smile a little. "It's for Quil," she stated as if it were the obvious answer, looking up at her mother while not letting go.
Post by Rayen Young on Sept 23, 2009 20:51:19 GMT -5
Feeling her daughters tiny hands reach around her and hug her Rayen quickly forgot all about been angry about the mess or even the mess itself. All she could think about was her little girl who she loved more then anything and Ray held her tighter in her arms as she kissed her head gently. Breathing deeply Rayen took in the scent of her little girl, she could smell their shared shampoo and the outside and unique Claire scent. Holding Claire in her arms Ray saw another face in her mind, but quickly pushed it away not wanting to feel sad.
As soon as her daughter spoke the name of the gift recipient Rayen smiled and nodded, she knew she should have guessed. Quil was Claire’s best friend as far as Claire knew, but he was her soul mate something Rayen was still adjusting too and was sure she always would be. “Well, sweety, why not make him cookies or a picture? I’m sure he doesn’t want our pans.” She said gently. “Now lets tidy this mess up then we’ll see what we have.” She said resigning herself to helping find this gift.
Post by Claire Titan on Oct 26, 2009 22:34:23 GMT -5
Nothing made Claire happier when other people smiled because of Quil too. She knew he always made her happy, and now that her mommy knew that she had been looking for something to give Quil, she was happy again too. It was just perfect. Claire immediate perked up at the possibility of cookies, and looked at her mother with big brown eyes. "We can make cookies?" she asked, as if it were too much of a burden, and almost too bashful to ask. She actually thought would really like one of the pans they had, maybe th one mommy always cooked in and had yummy food in. But maybe if she made cookies, Quil would share some with her.
Suddenly cleaning up the kitchen was a most excellent idea, and Raye should have thought of it sooner. "What kind of cookies?" she asked before picking up anything and committing herself to the clean up. Quil had to like what they were making.
Post by Rayen Young on Apr 16, 2010 20:15:30 GMT -5
Those eyes could make stone melt, Ray was sure of it. She could lose herself in those eyes and she shared those eyes with her father. In so many ways, maybe too many ways, Claire reminded her everyday of the man ray had lost. Now she pushed that away and nodded, “If we get cleaned up we’ll make cookies. Chocolate chip sound good?” She asked reaching out to push a few stray strands of hair behind the little girls’ ear. “Or peanut butter….or raisin.” She said suggesting a few alternatives as she reach to collect a stray pan lids.
“Lets clean up, then we’ll check the cupboards. This baking lesson may need a trip to the store first. You got your legs on for walking?” She asked her daughter smiling. The car was acting up again and it would be another pay check before she could drive to the La Push res and get the mechanics there to look at it. “Or we could make play doh cookies? And dirt tea and play make believe.” She said with her voice full of laughter and excitement at the idea of an afternoon doing anything fun with her little one. Forgotten was the mess, the house work and memories of the little girl’s father, Rayen was determined to concentrate on the fun stuff for the rest of the day.