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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Nov 23, 2008 7:58:33 GMT -5
If Carlisle still had a beating heart he was sure that it would be having a coronary right now - he could almost hear the frantic, erratic phantom beats. However, there was only one true heartbeat in the isolated house just outside Chicago, and that was just about to fail. Carlisle looked down at the pale boy lying on a rather dilapidated cot that had hastily been acquired to accommodate the change for him - anything to make it even a little more comfortable. He knew it wouldn’t really help, after all, what was two inches of padding when your every cell was on fire?
It had been three days since he had spoken to Elizabeth Masen about her son, two and a half days since she had died. She had been the one to really introduce the idea to the vampire and it was understandable that she would want to save her beloved son. Was this really what she had in mind? That singular, loving plea to help her loved one really appealed to Carlisle’s loneliness, his yearning for a companion, a family. He highly doubted that he would ever have one of those, but just one like himself, one that he could father into his way of life - it would make existing like this so much more bearable.
His amber eyes suddenly snapped into sharp focus, pulling away from the reverie, as he heard the abrupt halt of the heart. He took in every feature of the handsome vampire that he had sired and steeled himself for the moment he would open his crimson eyes. Carlisle could still remember that terrible, all-consuming thirst that had accompanied waking up to be a vampire and he was prepared to do everything he could to stop Edward from becoming a murderer.
“Edward?” he said softly, barely making any sound at all, but knowing that his new senses would pick it up if he was conscious.
Please make it through this… At last someone to share… Thank you Ms. Masen… Carlisle’s thoughts were coming fast and disjointed as his first son was about to be born.
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Post by Edward Cullen on Nov 23, 2008 22:50:11 GMT -5
Edward had known he was close to death. In the hospital the nurses had given him him looks as if they expected him to go at any minute, especially after his mother passed. He had known he was sick, that there were very few, if any who managed to survive the epidemic. But now he wasnt even in the hospital wing he had grown familiar with. He assumed it was a private room somewhere. Perhaps they thought him to be more contagious now.
He didnt have the strength to try to reason out his location. It wasn't important. Soon he would be leaving this world. He knew it was almost time. The pain had been even more excruciating the past few days. He didnt know how it was possible and had prayed for death so that he could be at peace. He had even started 'hallucinating' (or so he believed) that his doctor had attacked him, biting him.
Edward knew he couldnt deal with the pain much longer. Then it happened. Edward's eyes opened, looking around, seeing his doctor above him saying his name and speaking of his mother. For a brief moment Edward believed that this doctor was his angel of mercy, taking him to heaven to join her. The pain had lessened with his eyes open. But it was relief that lasted for only a moment before the back of his throat burned as the first of his own venom was released. The thirst had began, though he had no conceivable notion of what it was or what it meant. He threw his head back as his body gave out a low growl from his chest, expressing its need to feed. He hadn't been taken to heaven. This was definitely hell.
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Nov 24, 2008 13:34:15 GMT -5
Carlisle held his breath, not that it mattered, as Edward opened his eyes to take his first look at the world as a vampire. Crimson, blood-red scarlet. Carlisle's heart sank as the colour swam before his eyes. He had rather nievely hoped that this first son's eyes would mirror the amber of his own rather than the crimson of the monster.
I don't want him to see himself as a monster, he thought to himself, already a sense of protectiveness pervading his mind.
He leaned closer to the newborn vampire, despite his own first hand experience of the enraged thirst that affected them.
Whatever he decides I will support, he confirmed suddenly, his mental resolution forming words in his head. He had a good soul, if his mother is anything to go by - he'll make the right choice.
He jerked backwards with Edward's sudden growl and placed a hand on his chest, half to restrain, half to reassure him that someone was here for him.
"Edward Masen," he said, his physical voice much smoother and persuasive than that of his mind. "You're okay. The 'flu is gone. How are you feeling? Try to speak to me..."
He knew, of course, and he had prepared for the inevitability. There was a small pen of deer standing outside of the remote little house, which which Carlisle hoped to satiate Edward's thirst enough to make him sensible enough to talk to. It had taken him hours in Edward's days of pain to gather the half-dozen animals without using his teeth and killing them in the process - animals were very sensitive to the dangers that vampires posed. It would be worth it, though. He put a little more distance between them as he waited for the vampire's response, his fingertips now resting lightly on his shoulder and his every muscle ready to kick into action at a moment's notice.
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Post by Edward Cullen on Nov 25, 2008 13:00:17 GMT -5
Edward looked around him, hearing the voice of the doctor in his head (though not knowing that not all the words he heard were actually spoken). Monster? The word registered with Edward, through the pain, and burning thirst that he felt was consuming his thoughts. The venom was searing and he felt different than he had before the sickness. What had happned to him? What had this doctor done to him that he now was afraid of Edward thinking of himself as a monster.
His head thrashed from side to side, he would have jumped off the bed if not for Carlisle's hand on his chest trying to calm him. He heard the words 'he had a good soul'. This man was no angel like Edward had believed. He had taken Edward's soul, leaving him a monster now with a need for blood.
Edward made eye contact with the doctor as he spoke his name. There was rage behind Edward's eyes not understanding what was happening to him. He was afraid, but felt stronger than he ever had. The flu was gone? He knew he was going to die from the flu, how could it be gone now? He tried to think of something to say, so many questions in his head, but when asked how he was feeling, forming any sets of thoughts into words seemed more difficult. But there was one focus to every thought he was having. The thirst. "It...burns..."
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Nov 25, 2008 15:38:03 GMT -5
Carlisle pressed his lips together, quickly thinking over his options - suddenly this plan was slipping very much out of his control and he knew that he needed to pull it together again. His thoughts were coming much too quickly for a new mindreader to distinguish, they were barely finished before Carlisle himself understood them, but the general ring was of drinking the blood of animals, the dying image of Elizabeth Masen, Edward's own death mask, but no coherrent message. He looked down at Edward, nodding sympathetically.
"I know, I remember, but it will become more bearable in time, I can promise you that," Carlisle's own thirst had become tolerable enough to work with gratuitously bleeding humans, and so it would do for Edward... providing he chose Carlisle's way of life.
"There is a lot I need to explain to you, Edward, but I'm sure you need to drink first, to take anything in," he slowly pulled his hand away from the newborn's chest, his muscles tense enough to spring into action should he make any sudden movement. "Come with me."
Carlisle was confident enough that he had bought a house that was far enough away from civilisation to evade the most sensitive of vampiric senses.
It'll be fine, he told himself firmly, keeping his face set and definitely not speaking if Edward was looking at his lips at the time. He'll feed well enough and then he will hopefully come around to the vegetarian way of thinking when I've managed to speak to him a little.
He stood back from that table and waited for the vampire to move. "You'll be fine." Son.
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Post by Edward Cullen on Nov 25, 2008 23:53:33 GMT -5
Bearable? The word choice Carlisle had used made Edward realize that this feeling of thirst wasn't going to go away. It would be more bearable but wouldnt ever cease. He'd be left always with this burning, parched dry feeling in the back of his throat as he craved blood. He raised his hand to touch his neck, his eyes widening as he felt his own skin for the first time. It was so smooth, it seemed unnatural.
Edward was finding it hard to speak coherently. So many new things were coming at him at once. The sound of the doctor's voice which had normally been soothing sounded even more beautiful now. The scents that surrounded him in the room were strong, and his breathing felt different. He felt he needed the blood more than he needed air. Taking a breath didnt provide any satisfaction to his lungs. And then there was his vision. Details that had escaped him before were now crystal clear. The most remarkable was the doctor's face. He looked looked almost like a statue of a god.
When Carlisle removed his hand, Edward got up in one swift movement. He moved more gracefully than any student of ballet. Even though he had been near death with the influenza, and in enough pain that he wished for death the past few days, he now felt stronger than ever. His eyes were still studying Carlisle's face as Edward heard his thoughts. His lips didn't move but Edward could hear his thoughts as clear as he heard his words previously. He stared at him with his muscles tensed, wondering how this man had infiltrated his mind, sending him his thoughts in such a way. The man's lips then moved telling him he'd be fine. But when they closed again he heard one more word. Son.
"Son?" He questioned, still not able to move this thoughts far enough from the thirst to voice all his more detailed questions. He found it hard to talk as well when his throat felt so dry.
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Nov 27, 2008 16:06:27 GMT -5
Carlisle's eyebrows drew inwards at Edward's questioning word. Had he accidentally said the word outloud? He wouldn't have thought he would be so careless. He was treating this whole experience with the utmost care and attention, knowing that with any wrong move, he could send Edward spiralling down the seductive road of bloodlust without a look back. No, he was triple checking any decision he made, he wouldn't have been stupid enough to call him 'son' outloud.
"Son?" he echoed back, while his mind mused over the puzzle.
So, if he had heard him calling him 'son', what did that mean? His thoughts instantly flicked to his time with the Volturi - Aro, the most powerful vampire he had ever come across in his long years had read minds. But even he had to have physical contact with the subject before he could delve into their mind. And yet this newborn vampire derived from a 'flu striken boy, could be spontaneously mind reading.
What does this mean?
But he knew what it meant. It meant that he would have to be even more careful, internally, no distractions that could either scare the newborn off or alienate him from his sire. His mind suddenly snapped into sharp focus, the only image in his mind of Edward's confused eyes glowing crimson.
Don't be-
And then his words caught up with his thoughts.
"Don't be afraid, Edward. I will explain everything to you, every little thing. But I know your thirst must be hell just now. Once you've been partially satiated, once you can take it in with a little more comfort - then I will explain."
He spoke quickly and quietly, hoping to hold the boy's attention long enough to get his piece out. He attempted to consciously exude a calming atmosphere, keeping his expression calm and neutral, as he couldn't be sure just how much the other vampire could sense, nor in what manner. He turned to lead the way down to the pen of deer, keeping his muscles tense enough to defend himself or give chase. He hoped that the security of knowing Carlisle's thoughts, and thus his genuine intentions, would satisfy Edward enough to at least give him a proper chance to explain. While he knew that once they were close enough to the pulsing blood in the deer's bodies that the new vampire would be a slave to his new cravings, he couldn't help but worry that he would lose his new companion to lack of understanding. This thought saddened him considerably. He was already feeling a helpless need for one like him to share this lonely existence with.
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Post by Edward Cullen on Nov 30, 2008 0:10:11 GMT -5
When Dr. Cullen repeated the word Son back to him, it surprised Edward even more than hearing it the first time. What was the questioning tone in his voice now? Had Edward been hearing things? He honestly wouldn't be surprised if he was delerious. None of this made any sense to him. Perhaps he was still lying in a hospital bed with a high fever. Surely none of this could actually be real? It was just a horrible nitemare.
The then heard the doctor ask him what this meant. The space between Edward's eyebrow's narrowed as he gave him a questioning look. This was one of the many questions that Edward had for Dr. Cullen. What did any of this mean? What was happening to him? Why would the doctor ask him? Was he unsure himself what had happened to Edward. Had the devil overtaken his body?
It didnt take much convincing for Edward to agree that his thirst needed to be satisfied first. The pain of it was so great that it felt as though he'd rather cut off his own arm than to deny his thirst much longer. He could live without an arm, but living with this thirst seemed impossible. Edward nodded in agreement to wait for his answers and started to follow the Doctor out of the room.
Edward exited the room and walked down towards the pen. He stopped for a moment as he smelled something in the air. Straightening up his body he took a deep breath, letting the scent fill his lungs. Once his brain realized that this was the scent it had been craving he crouched forward letting out a growl before running off past Carlisle at an inhuman speed towards the pen of deer.
The deer attempted to scatter off, but they had no where to go which made Edward's first hunt easy for him. He jumped on top of the first deer he came close to. It slid through his arms at first, but he grabbed it by the leg before holding its body between his arms. He leaned foward seeing the pulsing artery below the skin, the smell of the blood intensifying. He didn't need experience to know what to do next. He was able to act on pure instinct. He leaned foward, and bit into the animal's neck, taking his first drink of blood.
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Nov 30, 2008 11:49:42 GMT -5
A surge of thirst assaulted Carlisle's throat as he sped up to catch up with Edward and watched him devour his first prey, though his long years of practice allowed him to bite it down, even though he was extremely thirsty. He hadn't drank for weeks, he had been so busy with the influenza epidemic, and then when he did finally have the chance to hunt he had to do so for his new companion - he knew that if he'd let himself go and allowed himself to drink whilst gathering the deer there would have been no chance of bringing them back alive. He had considered just taking the new vampire for a proper hunt, but he knew of the thirst that plagued a newborn's throat and mind, and he did not want to take the risk that they would cross the scent of a tastier prey. He continued to ponder the situation as he watched from the edge of the pen, taking his mind off the blood.
The only credible explanation is that he's a mindreader of some variety, he swiftly shifted his position to keep up with the limited chase in the pen. I'll need to test it, just to make sure... should probably do that after explaining this whole thing to him.
He put his hand out suddenly and stopped a young buck dead in its tracks, allowing himself to feed on its limited blood. There was no point in driving himself to distraction and the larger animals could be left to Edward's insatiable thirst. Even when he was feeding, however, he did not allow his dark amber eyes roam far from the new vampire and after a few minutes of solid feeding, he approached. He used a pace slightly quicker than human, but not full vampire speed.
"Are you ready?" To learn about what you are?
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Post by Edward Cullen on Dec 1, 2008 13:47:31 GMT -5
Once Edward had begun feeding, he paid very little attention to Dr. Cullen, focusing only on the feeling of the blood as it began ease his thirst. He had moved on quickly from one animal to the next, amazed at how easily he was able to capture them. None of them stood a chance against thim. He was no longer thinking of anything else but feeding. Thoughts of almost dying from the influenza were no where near his mind. He didn't even think back to the days of the excruciating pain that preceded his current state. The blood was everything to him now. His throat no longer burned. It feelt soothed by the blood as it went down.
He felt calmer and more satisfied as he noticed Carlisle's approach (having not even noticed earlier when the other man decided to feed). Edward raised his head from the body of the deer, and he rose up from his croached position. He nodded in response to Carlisle's question. He needed to know what had happened to him. He was no longer overwhelmed by the thirst and could think more clearly now. "Tell me"
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Dec 1, 2008 19:24:13 GMT -5
Carlisle’s hand closed around the ring that Elizabeth Masen had given him in her last gesture before her death.
“Give it to him,” she had said with trusting green eyes, despite her deathlike pallor. “When it is time.”
An hour later she drew her last breath and was transported out of the world forever. Edward was already in the little house Carlisle had acquired writhing in pain at that point and though he had never told the sick woman what he had done, she knew that he had been ‘saved’. She had wanted Edward to carry a part of her with him always.
Carlisle’s light topaz eyes looked directly into Edward’s own paler red ones. It would take quite a long while of following the vegetarian lifestyle before the new vampire’s eyes became the pleasant golden hue rather than the dangerous red. That didn’t matter so much at this stage, though. He nodded a little at Edward’s simple request, judging that he at least sounded sensible enough to take in what the doctor was about to say.
“I don’t know how much you remember of the last few days, Edward,” Carlisle began his story in a cautious manner, not wanting to blurt out the shocking fact that Edward Masen was a vampire. He stood rigid and unnaturally now as he concentrated on his words rather than acting human. “But I will start at the beginning.
“You remember that your mother and yourself were both admitted to the hospital in the late stages of the influenza? Well, towards the end of that time the prognosis was hopeless, your human body was too fragile to handle the unpleasant disease. If you remember, Mrs. Masen’s illness was more advanced than your own and I was assigned to attend both of you, among others. I’m afraid your mother didn’t make it, Edward.”
He paused and glanced up at the young man. He may be a vampire now, but he was also a seventeen year old boy learning that his mother had died. Oh no, had he turned him too young? No, he couldn’t think of that now. After a moment he continued,
“But I can tell you that she loved you dearly, more than herself. Her last request to me was to cure you in any way I knew how - she pleaded with me with every fibre of her being and who am I to deny a mother the love of her child?
"Edward, I’m a vampire,” there, he used the word for the first time out loud, saying it in a calm, even tone, in such a way that it sounded natural rather than like some supernatural horror. “I have been since the seventeenth century, but I’m not how you would imagine. I’m good, well… I try to be good - I’m… Well, I like to call it a ’vegetarian’, I only feed off animals, never humans. Never.
“The only tool I had left at my disposal was my venom - that was the only chance you had left of life and I made the decision for the first time in my life, to change you. I can’t pretend to have had entirely altruistic intentions, though, I’m only as good as the next man, but I would never have even considered it if your mother hadn’t been so insistent, if I hadn’t been sure that you were alone in the world…”
If I hadn’t been so lonely.
He paused in order to gauge Edward’s reactions to the onslaught of revelations he had just delivered. He didn’t want to overwhelm the boy, but at the same time it seemed impossible not to. Still at least he had someone to explain. Carlisle flashed back briefly to that dark time in the potato cellar he had trapped himself in, discovering just what he was. Once all this explanation and exposition was out of the way, if Edward still trusted him, he would provide the best role model he could. He had always tried to be good, but he would always be the best he could be now, because he had someone to exist for, someone relevant to his existence. It had been a long time since he could think that.
Throughout his words, his thoughts were peppered with images of the events and infused with the truth of his words. The doctor was intentionally being transparent, trying to make his thoughts as clear as possible just in case the newborn was a mind reader.
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Post by Edward Cullen on Dec 3, 2008 14:33:15 GMT -5
Edward tried to think as Carlisle brought up what he remembered of the last few days. He remembered pain. He remembered wanting to die, praying for death to come swiftly but it hadn’t. Instead of fighting as he had for life in the hospital, the past few days he had tried his best to let go, to go someplace more peaceful. Other than the pain, there was little that Edward remembered. He knew that Dr. Cullen was present with him, but nothing else. He didn’t even really know how much time had passed. It seemed like forever when there was that unbearable pain.
Edward didn’t speak; instead he wanted to hear what the doctor’s story of what happened would be. He knew it would be more accurate than his own that had been so clouded with his misery. He nodded as Dr. Cullen mentioned that he and his mother were admitted to the hospital with the Spanish influenza. That was something that Edward hadn’t forgotten about. They had been so sick. As sick as Edward had been, he had tried at home for as long as possible to take care of his ailing mother. But when he became weaker, they both needed to stay at the hospital, knowing they probably would never leave, but with the hope that the hospital staff would be able to make them more comfortable in the end.
Edward looked down as Dr. Cullen revealed that his mother hadn’t made it. It wasn’t a surprise to Edward; on some level he knew that his mother wouldn’t have survived this long. But knowing that didn’t make hearing the words any easier. He had loved her deeply and now the only family he had was gone. “She can’t be…I need her” He said in a soft whisper of denial, more to himself than Carlisle. He couldn’t imagine living his life without her guidance and love. He wished he had been there for her in her final hours. Been able to hold her hand, tell her that everything would be alright, to comfort her as she had comforted him so many times growing up.
He could hear Carlisle saying how his mother loved him. It was probably the only thing that kept Edward from becoming enraged with anger and finding something to destroy at the moment from his grief. He knew every day that she was with him that he was loved. He felt lucky for it.
Edward’s eyes met Carlisle’s as he told him he was a vampire. He didn’t understand what Carlisle was saying about not feeding off of humans when all the stories he had ever heard spoke only of murder. “Lucifer sent a demon with the face of an angel to make me into this…monster who craves blood!” He said yelling as he tried to comprehend everything. It was surely the devil’s work. Being a newborn he was finding it hard to control his emotions to keep from those outbursts. As Carlisle spoke of the venom, Edward could see his memory of the events. Edward’s hand instinctively went to the bite site, realizing his hallucination was real. But he also saw the Carlisle had pulled away so that he wouldn’t kill him. “But without you I’d be dead…” He went on as if he was working through everything, questioning as he went along. “Or am I dead? The undead? Some walking corpse?” He said not understanding what this meant for him. What choice if any did he have?
“My mother would never have wanted me to be a killer, she was a good woman!” He defended, trying to imagine his mother seeing him like this. Vampire. It was hard for him to even think of the word, he wasn’t sure he could say it yet. Did his mother want this for him, if it meant saving him from the influenza? His face softened a bit wondering if what he had said was true. He could picture his mother’s face as she begged Dr. Cullen to save Edward, pleading with him. He wondered how he could see it so clearly as if he was there, or if he was just imagining things as Carlisle described them. “She was insistent? On this?”
Alone. That was the emotion that Edward had felt when Carlisle told him that his mother had passed on. Now he was saying that was the deciding factor in doing this to Edward. The doctor had been lonely, and knew Edward would be as well. “Lonely?” Edward repeated the last word that his brain heard, trying to make sense of it.
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Dec 4, 2008 22:22:39 GMT -5
A shot of pain assaulted Carlisle’s chest around where his cold heart lay at Edward’s outburst. His own religious beliefs had assumed much the same, hunting out and murdering all that were considered dangerous by the church. Of course he now knew that the majority of them were just humans living their lives in a way that others disapproved of, but there were real demons out there. For a long time Carlisle had thought of himself in the demonic way, cowering away from his true nature in potato cellars, caves and dilapidated areas away from civilisation, but then revelation had hit. That revelation had take a life time to reach, could he speed it up for the tormented boy that stood before him? He certainly hoped so.
He nodded a little to Edward’s guarded and confused enquiries into his state of life and inhaled a deep breath as he thought of the best way to explain it.
“The way I see it,” he qualified, it wasn’t like there was an expert body of academic research on the subject, but Carlisle had been around long enough to see the ins and outs of his world. “Is that we’re still alive, active, living creatures. We can still die, we can still love and hurt equally. We’re vampires, but we’re still men. Our diets and our bodies have changed, but not our souls. You’re saved Edward, if I thought that meant ultimately damning you I wouldn’t even have considered it.”
He paused, taking unnecessary breaths as those last few scenes of Edward’s mother’s life replayed for him again, displaying the true anguish in her voice. Again he fiddled with the wedding bands in his pocket, eventually pulling them out, holding them on his white, open palm.
“She wanted you to have these. She had faith in me to fulfil her wishes to save you,” he glanced down at the metal engagement and wedding ring, tangible reminders of the man Edward was, where he came from, while the doctor stood before him as an indication of what he had become. He shifted a little, again unnecessarily, but a must to keep a recent human comfortable - he wouldn’t automatically adjust to the stillness that vampires could keep, he wouldn’t notice that he did it naturally with the absence of discomfort to make him fidget. He kept his eyes trained on the rings as he eventually came on to the question of loneliness. There was no doubt now that this newborn was some kind of mind reader; the loneliness was Carlisle’s own personal suffering and he didn’t burden others with it. He wouldn’t have said that aloud.
“I’ve been, with few exceptions, alone since I was turned, Edward. Either by race, living among humans, or by habits, living among vampires that feed off humans as prey. After a few centuries of that it begins to affect the thinking - a few years ago I wouldn’t have thought of bringing you into the fold, but the truth is that I enjoy the idea of being able to share this existence with a like-minded companion.”
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Post by Edward Cullen on Dec 7, 2008 16:07:26 GMT -5
Edward listened to Carlisle’s explanation that they were still living and had their souls. The older man seemed so sure of his answers, but Edward was still finding them hard to believe at the moment. “How can you say our souls aren’t damned yet tell me I’m now a…” Edward said having to force himself to say the word out loud, to hear it from his own lips. “Vampire” The word felt painful as it went through him. “The boy who had a soul didn’t crave blood…” he said realizing that meant he was also craving death, he would inevitably become a murderer.
Edward could see the image of his mother talking to Carlisle once again. He could hear that there was love towards him in his mother’s voice. She was trying to protect him. Edward looked down at the rings he held in his hand. It was breaking his heart knowing that his mother had left these for him, that he would never see the rings adorn her fingers again. He slowly reached out and took the rings, holding up and staring at them. The shine seemed to be so much brighter as he could now truly appreciate the magnificence of the jewelry.
“Did she really know…what you were…when she asked for this for me?” Edward asked him, wondering if his mother did know what he would become. Wouldn’t she hate the thought of her son as this creature? He could only imagine that he would repulse her if she saw him now. He hoped for that moment that she wasn’t looking down on him from heaven now. “Why wouldn’t she ask you to save us both?”
Edward listened once more as Carlisle explained how he had been alone since he was created. “Are you really that different than other vampires?” He said, still not fully grasping that he didn’t feed on humans as well. It seemed logical that if vampires exist, their diet was human blood. As sickened as the thought intellectually made Edward, he knew he was already craving the taste of it. “You…want me to stay with you?” He asked, surprised that Carlisle would pick him for a companion, someone he barely knew. Edward’s emotions were conflicted, but the thought did appeal to him, knowing he had no one left in his own life, and now he barely understood who he was.
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Post by Carlisle Cullen on Dec 9, 2008 13:42:02 GMT -5
Carlisle looked up and to the left, his eyes flicking away from Edward’s own, but just for a moment or two while he collected his thoughts. It seemed, from the gist of these thoughts, that the elder vampire was not entirely sure of his answer to Edward’s question. He paused before he spoke, narrowing his eyes as he tried to predict the newborn’s reaction, wondering if he had managed to gauge his uncertainty.
“If she knew what I was, then she didn’t say in so many words,” he told the younger boy carefully. “But I will say this - there were dozens of doctors milling around that hospital that night, there were too many patients for them to be assigned to certain doctors. She never once spoke to another doctor, just me. She saw something in me, Edward. She may not have known exactly what I was or what the transformation would involve, but she knew that I was the one to save you.”
He paused as Edward asked his next question. It was a good one, why just save the son? “Because she was utterly selfless,” he said, eventually, in a soft voice. “She considered her life lived - she’d had love of romantic and familial value, she was content. She wanted the same for you, I am sure.”
With the death of Edward’s father a few days before the other two Masens were admitted to the hospital, Mrs. Masen had lost her soul mate - it was probably her religion that made her want to be with him, but he couldn’t say that in conjecture. Instead, he allowed the young vampire to continue with his questions, understanding that he would have many of them. He needed to give Edward as much information as he could ask for, after having experienced the appalling lack of knowledge of being alone after the transformation, Carlisle did not what Edward to feel that way. Plus, all through the transformation, he was sure that he had made the transformation much more painful and bloody than it needed to be. Before, Carlisle had no idea what it was that changed the human body to that of a vampire, so he had gone to work in creating the same wounds that he had suffered himself all those years ago. He could barely think of it now without flinching.
“I have to admit that vampires are not the most accepting of races,” he told Edward, thinking back to the responses he had gotten due to his vegetarian nature - ranging between scorn and unprovoked violence. “Most embrace drinking human blood - it is their natural state. But it’s not one I’ve ever tried. Edward, I have never, ever, fed from a human, and I never will. I try to use our race’s special abilities to help the human world, to make up for the rest of us, just a little bit.”
He inhaled deeply, noting the subtle tones in Edward’s new scent and the increase in the natural beauty he had noticed despite his illness. His eyes dodged the newborn’s face for a moment as he brought up the future, sounding a little perplexed. They returned after a moment, though, a tentative look to them.
“Only if you wanted to.”
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